ugggh

Uggh. Who knew not wanting to eat something could be so complicated. How do I make this right...Obviously hubby works at a butcher block and deli so me becoming a vegetarian is not really an appealing thing for him. And he is an awesome chef and makes a mean steak, ribs, burger, etc. So I guess I should not have been surprised that he would not be happy with me wanting to go all veggie on him. And to be really honest I LOVE steak, I LOVE Salmon, and I LOVE ribs. But to clarify: the reason I want to become a vegetarian has nothing to do with how animals taste. It has to do with the fact that in order to eat and enjoy meat I have to put a blinder on a little part of me that cries out "this is wrong. You should NOT be eating meat, these animals are treated like crud and something had to die in order for me to eat this meal, there are other alternatives." Not to mention that the other alternatives could probably be just as tasty as the meat I enjoy. Currently I cook very little so Hubby is totally in charge in the kitchen. Occasionally I make macaroni, potatoes, or pizza. So I realize that it would be totally unfair of me to go veggie and expect him to cook for me. And I also realize that he hates most of the things I would be required to eat as a vegetarian in order to get proper protein (tofu, beans, mushrooms).

Are there any of you out there that truly want to go vegetarian and just can't? How do you eat a meal of steak and not feel guilty about it?

I guess I feel the same way about this as I do about other choices that I make that go against what I truly believe in. I am big on all kinds of rights but when it comes down to it I don't take an active role in making those things better. Is it really okay just to sit on the sidelines and be for something if you aren't out there doing something about it. Unfortunately this is kind of how our society is. Ugggh. (Welcome to my brain and the things I ponder and feel guilty about daily, and even more so around elections and when I see PETA ads)

On a good note our bid was accepted, YAY!!! Now we just have to have the inspection and get the loan. Keep your fingers crossed!

Track workout went well tonight.

2 mile warm up
build up mile (start slow get faster) 6:32.20
8*400
1.43.33
1.35.17
1.33.07
1.31.12
1.26.88
1.26.00
1.21.39
1.19.41
mile cool down

7.5 miles total

right foot is sore and left foot hurt during the rest sets. hmmm.

11 comments:

Sal said...

I don't know your email address so I'll just leave a really long comment here. If you want to talk more you can get my email address from David or Randy.

If you are concerned about fitness, all you need do is look at Scott Jurek: http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/othersports/233630_jurek22.html

The dude trains by running 120 miles per week. Yes he is genetically gifted, but so are you. You already run marathons. It will not be hard for you to eat well enough to maintain and improve yourself. If changing your diet will make you happier and feel less guilty about the way animals are treated on your behalf, then you should really look into it.

Here are my suggestions:

1) Start really slow. Check out some of the "fake meat" or TVP-based foods out there. A lot of them contain soy products, but I will go out on a limb and say a lot of the foods you eat now contain soy byproducts. Check out the Morningstar Farms products and see if you can determine which foods make you sick and which you can enjoy. That way you can eat well even on days where you (or David) don't feel like cooking.

2) Really think about what you want and what you are willing to accept. PETA is quite extreme and will only show you the most horrible images they can find. Do you care about how the animal is killed? How it lived? Do you care about some animals more than others and are you okay with that?

A lot of vegetarian athletes I have read about eat seafood. I don't consider that vegetarian but at least it's not a mammal. You don't care about how bugs are treated by exterminators, right? All life is compromise. You just have to figure out where the lines are for yourself and your beliefs.

E-Speed said...

Thanks for the advice Sal! I didn't realize Scott Jurek was a vegetarian. i know a few ultra runners in my club who are vegetarian and one guy who runs a marathon almost every weekend that is vegan so I know you can make it work, it just takes effort.

I agree that being a vegetarian would involve eating no meat, fish or otherwise. Personally I don't see the difference between a cow, chicken, or salmon.

But I guess you are right I probably wouldn't feel terribly guilty about an exterminator killing a cockroach if it were in my house. I would, however, feel guilty about killing a rat.

I think mostly I take issue with how animals are treated up until their death. And I also feel that if I couldn't go out and kill the animal myself I shouldn't eat it. And I know that I would not be able to shoot any living mammal or fish, let alone slaughter it in the manner which it is commonly done.

It is difficult because I know that others have a different opinion than me. And their opinions are of value to me.

I may write you and we can discuss more.

Neil said...

Anne and I have been transitioning into eating "happy meat." This is a way to reconcile the guilty feelings of eating stuff that might be from a bad place with the fact that meat is quite tasty.

We buy meat primarily from the BG deli because just like PETA has a lot of bad stories of meat, they have good ones of 4H animals. After seeing a youth who raises these animals, I realize that it is not bad to eat the meat. The animals are loved a lot.

Casey was also on the happy meat diet. I am more loosely on it than Anne.

Of course, Anne is pregnant, so we decided all bets were off when there is a craving. Her first venture from vegetarianism was non-happy veal!

I am glad to see you are dealing with that same "deep-down wrongness" feeling. We all deep with it in different ways, but it is important to address.

Hoebag said...

Vegetarian is Indian for "Bad Hunter"

Hoebag said...

On A different note, i know a few veg heads, there sick all winter. There are somethings in meat that you just cant get from soy or tofu. Not to mention that some places just dont offer a veggy meal. Not all meat is treated badly. Its mostly the veal that lives a horrible life. Those stories that are blown out of proportion on the news talk about maybe 5% of all meat in the US. So to say that all meat is treated badly is like sayin all muslims are bad just becase some like to blow crap up.

But you do what ever makes you happy. I just had to stand up for Meat, since only veggies were spoken for. :-) Congrats on the house.

Curly Su said...

damn, last person took my comment...but...congratulations on the house again...can't wait for your house warming party!

Anonymous said...

So you are against everything your husband does for a living? Thats a big leap to make. I hate preachy veg heads There almost as bad as religiuos freaks. So if you become one, have some respect and not push your new found fad on other people.

E-Speed said...

Thanks Neil!

Glad you and Anne are trying to find an alternative that is healthy and conscious!

E-Speed said...

Hoebag :) I love you!!!!!!!

I realize that not eating meat could be very unhealthy for me. I am going to do some serious research on diets that are healthy for athletes, etc.

I think that I can find some middle ground that meets my needs and the needs of my husband in our eating habits.

E-Speed said...

Curly Su!

Thanks.

I am just really really sending good vibes to myself on the home loan. I am really worried that we won't get it because my score dropped since approval....I am just hoping that we can get it to work out regardless!

Chicalookate said...

What a lot of my friends have done is slowly transition. Start by having a few veggie meals a week and work your way up. I know many happy veggie/meat eater couples. They just have twice as many dishes. And another option is to get meat that isn't laced with hormones and is from a small local farm. I do my best on that end, but it isn't always easy.

You seem to be really in touch with how your body reacts to things so I think you would know if you needed more protein. Where as I know vegetarians who eat nothing but bread and drink coffee... not healthy.